Since When Does the Role of Wife Include Victim?

^{Since When Does the Role of Wife Include Victim?} 

^{Proverbs 31: 10-31}

¹⁰ A wife of noble character who can find? 

   She is worth far more than rubies. 

¹¹ Her husband has full confidence in her 

   and lacks nothing of value. 

¹² She brings him good, not harm, 

   all the days of her life. 

¹³ She selects wool and flax 

   and works with eager hands. 

¹⁴ She is like the merchant ships, 

   bringing her food from afar. 

¹⁵ She gets up while it is still night; 

   she provides food for her family 

   and portions for her female servants. 

¹⁶ She considers a field and buys it; 

   out of her earnings she plants a vineyard. 

¹⁷ She sets about her work vigorously; 

   her arms are strong for her tasks. 

¹⁸ She sees that her trading is profitable, 

   and her lamp does not go out at night. 

¹⁹ In her hand she holds the distaff 

   and grasps the spindle with her fingers. 

²⁰ She opens her arms to the poor 

   and extends her hands to the needy. 

²¹ When it snows, she has no fear for her household; 

   for all of them are clothed in scarlet. 

²² She makes coverings for her bed; 

   she is clothed in fine linen and purple. 

²³ Her husband is respected at the city gate, 

   where he takes his seat among the elders of the land. 

²⁴ She makes linen garments and sells them, 

   and supplies the merchants with sashes. 

²⁵ She is clothed with strength and dignity; 

   she can laugh at the days to come. 

²⁶ She speaks with wisdom, 

   and faithful instruction is on her tongue. 

²⁷ She watches over the affairs of her household 

   and does not eat the bread of idleness. 

²⁸ Her children arise and call her blessed; 

   her husband also, and he praises her: 

²⁹ “Many women do noble things, 

   but you surpass them all.” 

³⁰ Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; 

   but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. 

³¹ Honor her for all that her hands have done, 

   and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

A growing trend I have noticed among housewives, especially military wives, is the victim mentality. I have mentioned in a previous post that I do believe that the stay-at-home mom and house wife, works incredibly hard and often the work goes unappreciated. We clean, organize and fix disasters that occur all day long and an outsider walking in would have no way of knowing all that has been accomplished. That being said, where to we get off whining about how hard we have it. 

I'm sure that there are some housewives who really never wanted to stay home, but most of us signed up for this life. I truly love being home to guide my son as he grows, and being able to serve my husband. It is very tempting to tell people about how hard my life is or how my husband is never home to help. Looking at Proverbs 31 (what I consider the standard for women), I don't see anything in there about: whining, complaining, or any other victim traits. 

The verse that stands out to me is 11, "Her husband has full confidence in her 

   and lacks nothing of value." I interpret that as, the husband may not compliment and notice every single thing she does, but he knows she is busy all day and he can depend on her to get the job done. 

I do not believe there is perfection this side of heaven, so why strive for something we can never        be. I do however, strive to be reliable for my husband. I may have a laundry pile sky high of: towels, my clothes and my sons clothes, but I make sure my husband always has a clean uniform. I may not make a gourmet meal every night, if fact we eat eggs multiple times a week, but there is always a hot meal. 

I know it is not always easy, but I want to challenge myself and you, to resist the urge to complain, putting further burden on our husbands, and instead pursue a life that serves our family  to such a degree that our husbands and children have complete faith in us. 

What to do With Bread Heels

What to do With Bread Heels

During a normal week, I can go through two to three loafs bread. My husband and I don't care to eat the heel pieces on sandwiches or as toast, and for the longest time I would throw them away or force us to eat them. 

With bread prices on the rise, I had to figure out a way to use them ALL. 

My mom has been making a dish for years that requires coarse bread crumbs, it is also one of my favorite recipes. I started storing all unwanted bread in a Ziplock bag and then preparing this recipe about once a week. There are many ways to use up those bread heels, I would love to hear your ideas and hope mine help you stretch that dollar a bit farther. 

Chicken Arugula

Dressing

3T olive oil

1 T balsamic Vinegar

1 t Dijon Mustard

1 large garlic clove, minced

¼ t blck pepper

¼ t salt

Prepare dressing  and mix or shake in a bowl

Salad

½ of a large red onion

1 large tomato diced

8 C arugula leaves (or a bag of spring salad mix)

Also

½ C Flour

2 large eggs, lightly beaten

2 cups coarse fresh bread crumbs

4 boneless, skinless chicken breasts

3 T olive Oil

In a large bowl, combine red onion and tomato. Pour dressing  over and place arugula on top.  Don’t mix, cover with plastic wrap and chill. ( I just keep the dressing separate that way the left over salad won’t spoil.)

Heat Olive Oil in pan. Place flour in a pie plate, eggs in another plate, and crumbs in a third plate. Rinse off chicken and dip in flour, then egg and then crumbs. Coat well. Place into hot oil in pan. Cook until chick is no longer pink. Be careful not to burn the crumbs. Add more oil as necessary. (The crumbs are difficult to get to stick to the chicken so I add extra croutons to the pan. I like the croutons to be really crispy  and it’s pretty hard to keep them that looking golden. I also use alot more oil the called for )

Put chicken on a plate, toss arugula and put it over chicken. 

my Ziplock bag of bread

                                                                   the salad ingredients                                                                                       
                                                    

what the finished dressing looks like

my three plates of flour, eggs, and bread crumbs

      

 

                                                                 

the chicken cooking

the end result

Hope you enjoy!

Shopping to Save Your Sanity

Shopping to Save Your Sanity

I absolutely love the privilege of being a stay at-home-mom (Sahm), however it is rare that anybody besides, those who are or have been, a SaHM understand the stress involved. Before I had my son, I would hear about these women who went out shopping while their husbands worked and I could not for the life of me understand how they could possibly shop every day. I must confess I did not think very nice thoughts towards the above mentioned women, I thought self righteously how I would never be one of 'those women'. 

I am one year into being a SaHM, and have been Navy Wife for two years. I truly love my life, but when my husband is working a twelve hour shift, the grandparents are 900 miles away and the little one is driving me nuts, sometimes the only way I can make it to the end of the day, is to get in the car and drive someplace.I am ashamed to say, that for awhile I went to khol's almost every day, and on days I wasn't in khol's I was at target. From October to December I used Christmas shopping as an excuse that I NEEDED to shop.

I was shopping because it gave me time in the car to listen to the radio while my son was happy looking out the window. Once I got to the store, I could just push stroller around and browse, when we got home, it was either time for a nap or dinner leading towards bed. Shopping was my only trick to saving my sanity on a rough day. Before I knew it I was spending all our "fun" money on "great bargains"  or items that we had "needed for a long time and just happened to be 50%off ". I am all about shopping clearance, and most times you do have to browse to find the good deals, but I wasn't really saving money when I was buying items, that yeah I wanted/needed, but hadn't budgeted to buy.

I still go browsing quite often, but when I look at something and instinctively think "I need that" I ask my self  why I currently don't have one and if I am still getting the job done without it, most of the time the answer is yes. Someday I will buy all the nifty gadgets like pizza cutters, a fancier can opener, and the holiday dish towels, but not today and certainly not everyday.

I have also found better ways to keep my brain going on an adult level, which helps me from feeling stir crazy. Libraries have audio CD's, which sounds nerdy, but are alot of fun to listen to while the little one is down and your folding laundry or cleaning the kitchen. I have probably been through 25 audio books in the last year, it makes me feel like I getting more done then just refolding the same clothes over and over and over again.

I have also started crocheting while my son plays. I can sit on the floor with him, be interacting with him while still working on something I enjoy, it is easy to pick up and put down and virtually harmless to have next to him.

Being a SaHM is truly one of the greatest blessings in life. In order to be that mom who happily sings silly songs with her kids, and is over joyed to play on the floor, you have to keep yourself at a minimum feeling sane but hopefully feeling happy and blessed. 

Fresh Strawberry Topping

Fresh Strawberry Topping

My husband and I love to eat breakfast food regardless of the time of day, and because of the rotating shift work he is currently on, there are days where breakfast is the only meal he eats at home. I had been wanting to make a fresh strawberry compote but I could not find  single recipe online for what I wanted, so I made my own very simple topping that is delicious.  

Ingredients:

Strawberry's diced, I used about half a container for 

5 pieces of french toast

                                                          Sugar I used about 1/8th of a cup

                                                        Orange Juice about 1/8th of a cup

Mash Strawberries 

                                                       Add sugar and orange juice and mix

Add to the top of pancakes, crepes, french toast, or anything else you might think of.

my husbands plate 

                                                                           my plate

This topping is just a guide line, I have made it using various amounts. Just taste test before you serve.

  Hope you enjoy! 

Groceries: Need vs. Want

Groceries: Need vs. Want

One of the many responsibilities that often falls on the Navy wife, is managing the household finances. The reason is simply that our husbands are not home during normal hours and are often gone for three to six months at a time. I am sure that many civilian wives also manage the finances for one reason or another as well.

I have been struggling to stick to my budget, which allots, a $140 per week for groceries.That is $560 a month!!! Which is ridiculousness for two adults, an 11 month old, and 3 pets.  I explained my predicament, of not having given myself enough money for grocery's, to my husband and was astounded when he responded with "do we NEED everything you buy"? My first response was "of course we do, we need to eat!". 

Lets face it, my job as a homemaker is to take care of my family, and I like to make sure we have great food. I realized that I might be purchasing a significantly more then the food we needed, the food that actually was going into the preparation of meals. I often enter the grocery store with a list of 30 items, and before I even cross one thing off my list, my cart already has several items in it. I know there will always be things you see in the store that you really do need such as soap or diapers, but I am guilty of adding the extras. 

I seek to manage my expenses in a way that will prosper my family, and I thought I had been doing great by saying "no" to new clothes and other shinnies that tempt the wallet. I never dreamed my weakness would my grocery bill. Truth is I just assumed we needed food and since I was frugal everywhere else I didn't really need to watch what I spent on grocery's. My husband had to point out the blindly obvious to me. 

Here is what I have done to help us keep more of our money!

1. I asked for my husbands help in identifying why I was struggling, to stay in budget. 

2. I love to bake, half of my grocery bill was on items to bake with. Reducing the amount of goodies I made will keep us healthier and more on target with our finances.

3. I never got in on the coupon craze, but I have been making an effort to grab coupons when i see them and then actually use them. I started saving about eight dollars a trip, which isn't a ton but it's something!

4. I'm sure you have heard, "never shop hungry", that really does help me. 

5. If I shop when I think my son will his happiest I am prone to look for better bargains and evaluate my purchase more. I end up just throwing anything in the cart to be done if I go to close to shop to close to nap time. 

I think that by serving our families in how we spend the household income can be one of the greatest ways to bless your family.

Mom Needs Coffee

Mom Needs Coffee

My son Jackson is 11 months old and has twice the energy I do! I love nothing more then to spend the majority of the day on the floor playing with him. One of the challenges I face is that when he wakes up, he is wide awake and ready to play. I, on the other hand, need a big cup of coffee.

When we first get up, I start making the coffee and feeding Jackson his cheerios and yogurt. I eat, and tidy the kitchen while he eats. When he is done eating he is ready to commence with the play and I am ready to sit down with a cup of coffee, I consider this an ideal time for some independent play. I have started prepping my living room the night before with an activity that is either new, or has been awhile since he as seen. 

 

              Today he used pots as drums, he was fascinated by the different sounds they made. Every time he would strike one of the pots, he would laugh and look to me for approval, I would praise him and he would repeat. He had a blast, but true to baby form this great activity only held his attention for about fifteen minutes. I had enough time to down some coffee and wake up. 

All kids are different, be cautious about using the metal pans and what you give them to hit the pans with. My son happened to do a good job of only hitting the pans and not bash himself in the head with pans... at first, when he had lost interest in how I wanted him to use the pans I moved us along to a different activity. I hope you find a way to enjoy your morning coffee.